Panic

He's leaving. 

I know it. 

Before he says those words that will change our lives 

or offers that weak apology that will make me hate him even more, 

I know he's leaving. 

And all I feel is Panic.

 As much as I want to hate him now the only thing I remember is how good we were 

and how hard it was to find him, 

my fallen angel, 

and how hard it was to feel safe in his arms and 

how deeply I loved him and 

how blindly I trusted 

and I wonder if I will ever breathe again. 

I know I will, of course.....but still I panic....